It’s a common thing most people go through – they find it easier to stay mad than to be sad. Once you build up a head of steam, many people find it tough to let go and simmer down. Ever wondered why?
Some of the reasons are obvious enough but even knowing why you stay angry; it is difficult to let go. But holding on to anger is not healthy for the mind as well as the body. Excessive anger and inability to let go of that anger can over time make you bitter, resentful, increase a feeling of hopelessness and put you in a vicious loop of negativity that will take a toll on your physical health as well.
Over time, it can lead to anxiety, mood disorders or even depression. Here are a few reasons why people tend to hold on to anger even when they know it is healthier to let go.
Number one reason could be that staying angry validates your experience (whatever it is that made you angry).Another reason is that you may not have developed the mechanism to manage emotions. Simply put, many people don’t know how to self-soothe.Big reason to hold on to anger is that being angry is more comfortable than being sad. It may be that what you feel is sad, but you don’t know how to cope with that so you become angry and stay angry instead.Yet another reason could be conditioning – you could be modelling behaviour of your parents whom you saw holding grudges when you were growing up.A few people stay angry as it helps them avoid being accountable or take responsibility. The anger is a defense mechanism to not cope with the reality that maybe you are in the wrong.Disturbing as it may be, some people stay angry because being angry gives them an adrenaline rush and they feel more alive.Lastly, staying angry could be defense mechanism as you want to protect yourself from being hurt.